Mum joining group therapy

Soul destroying. Yet not for mum. She was laughing louder than before. Which doesn’t always mean a good thing. She can be super nervous sometimes when she laughs so loudly. This day saw us checking out the local group therapy.

Inappropriate behavior is not uncommon with mum. Walking into a room and saying, “ohhhh lots of men…ohhh I might pull.”

Seemingly, I became invisible as we walked from one baking hot room to the other. Mum is always cold as her heart beats so slowly these days, yet even she took off her cardigan.

The first room showed us the first lady who met our eyes. She was with tremors, the type you see in Parkinsons. Her hair was dyed too dark. She looked sad and vacant. Oh no, this was exactly what I didn’t want. Was all this too soon for mum? Was she ready for this? Was it going to frighten her that this is how she may become?


“A stich in time…..” The group leader called out. Half of the group responded, “….saves nine…”

“A bird in the hand….” It seemed this was a group task to get them thinking. More people answered than not. Likely it would make them feel super smart. So they were

remembering plenty. A sweet shihtzu female laid out asleep on the floor. She was just wonderful. My shihtzu would never lay there like That. He’s a pickle.

“Would you like a cup of tea Margaret?”

“Oh yes I would please.” Mum replied with gusto. I was looking at my watch thinking I needed to collect Nathan from college in like 10 minutes. He was kind enough to give me the car as I was taking it for a service. It’s all been GO GO GO today.


But I need to go…

Would the ten minutes be enough time for mum to drink scorching tea? Who knew?

In we went to the other room for newly diagnosed dementia patients. It was ‘COGS’….

For some reason I expected a sensory room! Why did I think that? Alas no, instead we were met with two tables of older people playing bingo. They were chatty.

Mum immediately sat down and made herself at home. Gosh she and I couldn’t be more different. I could think of nothing worse than sitting in a room full of strangers. Hence I like writing. Not a loner but a very tight inner circle. Sometimes I wish I could be more like Mum. Yet she hasn’t been through the hurt I have. Every time, that circle has got smaller and smaller.

“We are playing bingo Margaret, would you like to play?”

“Yes please.” She sat herself down without looking back at me. I checked my watch again,

“I need to collect my son in a bit.” I told the lady in charge.

“How long will you be?”

“About half an hour.” And the lady said leave her with us. I gave my phone number and informed them of mums heart issues and off I went. I was shocked. Mum has always been quite clingy to me of late. I explained to her where I was off to and she was totally fine.

Upon my return she had enjoyed it. She was telling drawn out stories of what lunch is all about etc and there I was trying to deal with a house sale, purchase, collecting of deeds, learning what probate is from the handsome solicitor, while dealing with my own massive issues in my own life right now which must stay under wraps and on the back burner.


This headache has lasted 7 days now…






Not an expert on dementia so please see your healthcare professional if you have worries. I’m just a daughter and a writer.



  1. raychul

    Love how raw and real these posts are, this will make a wonderful book. Hope youre doing okay

    1. Louise

      Thank you for your lovely comment! I am actually making this a little book. There is much more rawness in the book and I make the easier stuff visible on my blog here….keep in touch x

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